I went to Switzerland alone

Before I start, the point of this post is not to convince people that solo travelling changes your life. I believe that certain experiences can be more life-changing for some than others, and it’s up to the individual person to determine if that’s something they’d like to try and makes sense for them. It’s also a huge privilege to do so. I’m sharing a part of my experience I want to tell that impacted my life deeply.

I recently had a major loss in my life, and it was hard for me to stay focused. I found myself unable to control my feelings throughout the day, and I struggled to sit and process my emotions. My work requires talking to people and it’s something I love doing, but it can be hard when I’m struggling.

I needed to trust myself again with my emotions, trust that I can take care of myself, and trust that I can make myself feel safe and secure again. So my conclusion was this: I needed to go to a random country and disappear for a bit with no plan to prove to myself that I can rely on myself to get through what is to come. I only had three goals this trip - stay alive, don’t get robbed, and have fun.

I made somewhat of a plan the night before. I booked a hotel in a small town just on the border of Italy, and I had 5 days to make it back to Zurich before my flight home. I went to the information booth for help, but they were pretty confusing and then told me to go book my tickets at another station. I went to the other side and walked in, and I heard someone being yelled at by a transit employee in German. I walked straight out. I got anxious and thought to myself that being alone here was a mistake.

Filled with anxiety, I wandered around the station for an hour until I found the ticket booth. My only goal now was to make it to my hotel. After 3 hours, I made it. I wanted to get dinner before checking in, so I decided to explore the town a bit. At this point, I was surprised I even made it this far and didn’t give up. I felt proud of myself that I was able to make it all the way here. I also felt terrified leaving a more English-speaking city like Zurich to a town that only spoke Italian. I couldn’t ask anyone for help, and I just had to guess my way around.

I found a place to have dinner, but I had the wrong address and I took a bus that drove me up a mountain. I met a stranger from Norway on the bus who was solo travelling and just as lost as I was. When we were trying to figure out where we were going, he lost grip of his suitcase and it fell down the hill. I tried to grab his suitcase and mine rolled down. At that moment we both just laughed together at how lost we were. Somehow, we both were staying at the same hotel and had to go back down, but decided to hang around and watch the sun go down since we both had no rush to get there.

After that, I said goodbye to my new friend. He told me to visit Bern, so I booked a place there and was on my way the next morning. After exploring, I had lunch sitting at a park and watched the people of Bern walk around. It was calming to see others in a different country live their life and go about their ways on another average day for them. I saw a group of girls about my age just chatting and laughing at a bench, people playing board games, some enjoying a picnic, and a few backpackers making their way around town. I felt so much joy just being around people from all walks of life together in this moment.

I went to a few more places and found a few hidden gems, just asking locals where I should go next. I discovered this small town near Lake Lucerne and booked a relatively cheap hotel with phenomenal views. Had I not asked around, I would have never found this place. It was so calm and quiet, with no tourists. After a solo hike, I was sitting on a bench in front of the lake with views of the Alps and I felt immense calm within me. After a few days of feeling anxious, I suddenly felt okay. While I was alone, I never felt alone.

On my way back to Zurich airport, I was chatting with the cashier at the place I was storing my luggage, and I told her I really liked her necklace. It was the shape of a sun, and I told her my name meant sunshine. Somehow the shop had a necklace that was similar to hers and she gave it to me for free, saying it was meant to be.

I remembered a phrase someone told me “You are never alone”. Meeting strangers and being present in the new environment I was in made me realize I haven’t been the first human to solo travel, I’m not the first human to be lost in a new country, and I’m not the first human to feel fear, grief, sadness, anger, happiness, joy and love, and so many more experiences.

I’m used to building projects with no end plan and figuring it out, and often times there are very few people who can relate to that specific experience. But regardless of what others do for a living or what sequence of events happened to them, we all had moments of being lost, confused, scared, and unsure of the future.

I came home with a lot more compassion for myself and others. To give people the space to feel if they need it, and to give myself the space to feel as well. And also, if I ever need to remind myself of this, regularly taking walks or sitting at a cafe without my phone can be just as effective :)

Find some of my film from this trip here!